The greatest entertainment so far from the ACC kickoff event in Pinehurst, N.C., was watching the annual media guide haul, an exercise that really would be a great replacement for a potato-sack race at company picnics.
It's easy: Take a group of sportswriters (not a group collectively known for their commitment to fitness), have them grab more than a dozen 208-page books printed on high stock paper, and watch them carry them around a resort in search of their hotel room, car or simply a place to sit down to prevent their backs from buckling (replace "sportswriters" with "company executives" as need be).
There is one benefit of partaking in such madness: Nothing provides a bigger early glimpse into what any team -- college or pro -- thinks of itself than what it plops on its media guide cover.
Sure, that seems a little condescending and self-centered, since media guides are ostensibly made for, well, the media. But they're also hawked for 10-to-20 bucks a pop, so fans can more than easily get their hands on a few, too.
They're also a team publication, filled with all the cheery optimism that comes before a fine season (or a 3-9 disaster). As one prominent college lacrosse coach once said of the content not necessarily reflecting reality, "It's a preview, but it's our preview."
The cover, though, can only provide so much spin. A team can opt to emphasize its past, which can be a good thing (as Florida is doing this year with its tribute to last year's national champions), or a single star player.
There's also the new coach gambit, something four ACC teams have this year. And the display of each of the coaches is striking:
Miami: Randy Shannon is the only person featured, with three background photos of his role on three national champions at The U and one big shot of him as he takes his first head coaching gig.
N.C. State: A glimpse of an intimidating Tom O'Brien (is there any other kind?) dominates the page, though he is flanked by six players. Another 13 appear on the back, but his arrival is clearly important.
Boston College: Any new coach -- even Don Shula or George Halas, and definitely Jeff Jagodzinski -- was going to share top billing with quarterback Matt Ryan this year. But everything else besides the Boston skyline was relegated to the back cover or elsewhere.
North Carolina: The Tar Heels probably made the biggest splash when they hired Butch Davis, but his is one of nine images on the busy Carolina cover. Heck, kicker Connor Barth gets virtually equal billing. I'm almost shuddering at the thought of the number of references to "a team concept" Davis is likely to employ today.
Only two other coaches are listed by name: Virginia Tech's Frank Beamer and Maryland's Ralph Friedgen. The Fridge is joined by action shots of Lance Ball, Andrew Crummey, Isaiah Gardner and Dre Moore, good guys all and superstars none. On the surface, it's a pretty anonymous team.
And as for everybody else, there's mostly balance besides Virginia, where "Chris Long, defensive player of the year candidate" occupies the entire cover. Wake Forest includes a series of photos from its league title last year, as well it should. Between five and six players occupy a spot on the front of the Clemson, Georgia Tech and Virginia Tech books.
Florida State stuck four small action shots below a huge photo of Chief Osceola. And Duke might have Carolina trumped on the whole team thing. Mug shots of 10 seniors arc across the top of the cover, while there are action shots of eight underclassmen below "DUKE" in about 100-point type.
Of course, none of this means much of anything once reality intercedes in September. But it's a nice way to pass some time (and fill a blog entry) in the interim.
