We are in a post-birthday funk and hardly anything is interesting us midweek. Perhaps we have just had too much cake -- and shopping. Perhaps it is just our annual post-Emmy's funk. We really do need some new episodes of Dancing With the Stars to kick-start our glam mojo, although our new Tiffany necklace is ever so fab.

In any event, we offer these measly musings:

We think that kid who shouted down John Kerry at the University of Florida -- Go Gators! -- probably has a good case for overkill, and we note that he has already lawyered up with one of the best defense attorneys in North Florida, showing he means business.

Stay tuned.

We love his line to police: "Don't tase me, bro." It's straight out of a National Lampoon fraternity movie. Dude, that must've hurt. There is a college cure for it, however. Cheap beer and greasy chicken wings. Terrific good stuff.

We like it that "The View" has new faces, but we think there are now too many at that table and they are stepping on top of each other before any real points can be made. It's kind of like each of them are trying to out-thoughtful one another, or see who can be the funniest. It gives us grave anxiety. It's the same reason we simply could not join a sorority. Too many chicks yappin' all at once. AS IF.

We can totally applaud reform of our national healthcare, including caps on drug company profits -- but the whole Hillary plan gives us total pause. When you have government mandating personal choice -- it doesn't feel like we are in America, no? "Look, lady: We'll go to the doctor when we want to, k?" Mebbe we should rethink that timeshare in Costa Rica, or Cabo or somesuch.

We hope Kelly Ripa is eating enough. She is wasting away just like Angelina. We are concerned.

We discovered, upon recommendation of our galpal George, that rice noodles don't make us sick the way full-on pasta often does. Mebbe it's a wheat thing. We are converting. For now.

Is there silence in the McCain camp or are people just not paying attention? The only person who is attacking Hillary with any flare is Rudy, it would seem. We love it, by the way. Those two have the kind of personal baggage that makes for media carnage.

Those MoveOn.org freaks oughta get Rudy's angry spawn to do a commercial. And BTW: Where is Chelsea? Shouldn't she be getting out there about now? We think she's an asset, makes Hillary look good on some level. We are going to leave Chelsea a message on her Facebook wall tonight asking her 'What gives'? We hope she will let us be one of her friends.

We discern, from all the hyper-ventilating press releases that are clogging our princess mailbox (get a life, you overeducated teenage Hill staffers) that the government might shut down. COOL. Most of it, we'll never miss. Be good for us all to see how little we can get by on a big federal diet. Be kind of like Nutri-System for the nation.

-- Andrea Billups, The Washington Times